Stop trying to grasp, own, and control the world around you.
Examine an Attachment
For today’s assignment you will write 2 drafts about a specific situation in your life that needs clarity or healing (e.g. a fight you had, a heartache, or a something a loved one did that made you upset).
1. In the first draft, write how you remember it.
For example: how it made you feel in the moment, what it made you fear, or why it upset you.
2. In the second draft, write the story using only facts.
In this draft you will not include opinions, assumptions, accusations, or renderings of the situation.
3. Compare the two stories.
4. Ask yourself the following questions:
- Was the second story less dramatic?
- Were you putting too much emphasis on something that wasn’t as important?
- In the grand scheme of life, how much did this situation actually change/affect your life for the negative?
- Is there anything positive you can draw from this situation?
Once you learn to examine situations in this manner, you will start to realize how much wasted energy and emotion went into something that may not have actually mattered to you so much.
You will be able to see these situations from various and brand new points of views that may change the way you feel about them.
How we experience the world is largely a result of how we internalize it. Instead of telling yourself dramatic stories about the past—how hurt you were or how hard it was—challenge your emotions and focus on lessons learned. That’s all you really need from yesterday.
There are things we tells ourselves, such as: I can’t let him go; I’ll be miserable without him; I’d die if I lost her; she’s all that I have.
These thoughts reinforce beliefs that are not fact, even if they feel like it.
The only way to let go and feel less pain is to believe you’re strong enough to carry on if and when things change.